aliveandticking | 00:11 [ 4th wall day ]

00:11 [ 4th wall day ]

there are a lot of people here today!
its probably not permanent but if anyone wants to visit me they can :)

actually i am not feeling very :) right now
i think i have made the right choice in not focusing on romance!
it is complicated
because its important
but because its important people get hurt over it
and it doesnt help that nobody knows what they feel
feelings are difficult to understand even if you understand everything else there is
so i dont have any creepy prophetic advice to give about it haha sorry

but i think probably
everyone will come out ok
either ok or dead which also fixes the problem

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come over now!
we can watch them and i can tell you how close ive gotten to his adventures
it is pretty unrealistic but it sure is fun

ok sure on my way

i will have snacks ready!

[ and because she is made of time, by the time he gets upstairs she has a nice spread of... prawn cocktail chips, pickles, and olives. When troll palates meet human food some strange combinations occur, and aradia has found a taste for tangy pickled things ]

[ and as soon as he walks in the door he can smell it and it's baaaad. ]

Probably should've brought my own snacks, huh.

What do you mean? I think it smells delicious!

It smells like the god of all things bitter took a shit in my nose.

Exactly, it wakes you up! If you're going to be a wriggler about it, I'll make you some popcorn, though.

I'm your picky, alien guest, Megido. Gotta keep me happy or I'll tell all my friends about your mismatched china.

[ she laughs, heading towards the microwave ] It's the other way around on Alternia, you know! Guests have to bring a suitable gift, or you can feed them to your lusus.

[ he guesses it's that way around on earth, too, but that white-gloved lady metaphor was great and he's standing by it.

he flops down on the couch, eying her 'snacks'. ]

Are pickles still considered vegetables?

Maybe! I don't think they've become anything else.

I guessed it'd be like asking 'are old, wrinkly people still people'.

[ he decides not to eat one anyway. they look like shriveled up dicks. ]

These look like shriveled up dicks.

Shriveled-up... [ she leaves the popcorn popping and comes over to look at them ] I don't think I want to know what part of human anatomy that is!

You know. 100% all-beef thermometer. Kentucky telescope. Blue-veined jackhammer. Weapon of mass destruction. Disco stick. Breakfast burrito. Mushroom-tipped man sword. One-holed friction whistle. Perpendicular bisector. Burning meat pipe. Need I continue?

[ STARES IN FASCINATION..... ] Wow, that is a lot of metaphors!

I've got more.

I'm kind of curious, and also I kind of don't want to eat pickles any more!

Leather lollipop. Foaming beef probe. Mutton dagger. Mr Johnson and the juice crew. Pants wombat. Winky the milk spitting tunnel ferret. Eight inches of throbbing pink Jesus. Dribbling dart of love.

[ she's giggling now, with a slightly horrified undertone ] Eww, Dave! You're just messing with me, aren't you!

I'm teaching you how to be embarrassingly eloquent.

You're teaching me how to be really dirty, is what you're doing! How would you feel if I suddenly started talking about shame globes and bone bulges??

Delightfully educated.

[ she's going pretty red but SHE'LL BE DAMNED IF SHE EVER BACKS DOWN FROM ANYTHING ] Okaaaaay... pulsating embarrassment nodule. Conjugal cartilage crest. Uncharted mountain of-- [ nope she's giggling too hard to continue i hope you're happy dave ]

[ gives her a short round of applause because damn, she tried. ]

[ RUNS BACK TO THE KITCHEN TO GET THE POPCORN OH MY GOD...... ]

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hashrap - 2011-10-03 01:51 (UTC) - Expand

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aliveandticking - 2011-10-03 01:55 (UTC) - Expand

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